sebelum amir lahir... aku dah decide to do this, this, this, this, ...
let me list these things:


1. sleep-train... he needs to learn to sleep on his own
2. sleep away from us, in his cot in his own room
3. no excessive carrying... kang nak berdukung jek
4. no buai.. nanti takleh tido tanpa buai, camne nak gi jalan..
5. come of age, naughty je babab...
6. etc lah....


basically, totally un-AP (attachment parenting)
coz if u knew me... I have becomed hardened by life,
was a phase aku rase sungguh dipergunakan bila aku naive and selfless..
so when I turned into an adult...
I am determined to be selfish.. !! Usaha tu... perlu fikirkan diri sendiri dulu...
now, it comes like 2nd nature to be selfish ngahahaha...


anyways... I was determined that the baby, will not get the best of me.. aku takkan dipijak..
He will be under my rule... I need sleep, I need rest... basically me being selfish...
you go sleep in you room.... you learn to sleep, tak kuasa nak dodoi dodoi 3-4 jam..
the thought of babywearing, co-sleeping and buai-ing ..sungguhla nyusahkan hidup..
p/s: If I had known breastfeeding was so freaking hard, maybe aku plan utk tak BF kot..
tapi masa ni tatau pun BF tu nyusahkan hidup aku...



and the baby comes...
and sungguh la jadik opposite of what I had planned to be....
and I dont know why....
somehow tetiba terjadik bf-ing, bw-ing, co-sleeping, buai-ing mom...
and at that time also dunno the concept of AP....
somehow doing all these things feels right....


I am not saying amir ni tak ngada, manja, independent, etc...
sungguh la ngada, manja and nak berkepit ngn aku...
sejak leh recognize face tak penah tido tanpa aku (except 1 night masa die gi kedah and aku pun gi tgk startrek midnight)
and I dunno how he is gonna turn out...
sometimes bila die ngada-ngada.. tantrummy.... ade gak rase .. ini ke product of AP..? if so, nyesal aku...
tapi macamla budak yg tak raised AP.. takkan throw tantrum and ngada2....
sama je kot.... I dunno... I really dont...



yang penting... to deny a baby from his mother's love, protection and care just feels wrong...
to force sleep training -cry it out method, to force into a separate room, to deny carrying a baby sedangkan die nangis2 nak diangkat and feel secure...
is JUST WRONG...... period.


but I am still selfish...
kalau ikut aku la, aku prefer to sleep separately... and to not BF..
kalau amir boleh and wants to sleep away.. boleh tido away from me with his grandparents... sesungguhnya I WELCOME it !! please take him.. 2-3 hari pon boleh..
but now amir wants co-sleep, amir wants to sleep with me....
what is best for you, is not what is best for baby....



but some form of dicipline will be required for this "terrible-two" year to come.
not sure what yet... i need a book.

P/S: This post was inspired by this entry:
http://glam-mama-diaries.blogspot.com/2010/02/co-sleeping-my-history-and-how-it.html

Blog giveaway.. but not this blog... on my other blog....

http://coachandsuch.blogspot.com/2010/02/blog-giveaway-follow-me.html

You can pick a prize from these brands:  
Estee Lauder, MAC, Everyday Minerals, Shu Uemura, Victoria's Secret, Logistics for Men, Anna Sui.

No need for amek gamba, banner, blog entry, slogan, etc... just click to follow :)
too easy meh

as I was searching for the mini sudu for our office pantry creamer..
terngiang ngiang zaman kena buat susu formula utk adik aku yg 2 last tu...
bila bukak tin susu baru.. mengagau gagau carik scoop......
skang, aku tau frisogold boh scoop die lekat kat tudung tin....

point is... tak merasa pengalaman nak buat susu formula...
the heating up air... sejukkan susu kalau telebih panas..
goncang goncang...feed using botol
(also, lama gile kitorang tak feed guna botol for EBM.. kat nursery je kot)
pastu travelling with powder formula... termos..
weird la pulak tak buat semua tu skarang...
coz that was a big part of raising a baby for me...


seriusly... I have no clue watsoever about formula...
ape yg bagus, tak bagus, mahal, sembelit, muntah, dha, immunoglobin, etc...
imtotallyclueless...... not sure if its a good thing or bad thing...

lentok on da boobs sambil tgk tv..

ni yang aku tensen ni..

Update susu... semalam dpt extra.. suka!! 2 kali pump at work..


ni pulak kenapa I dont stop breastfeeding ... nak kena jaga gigi amir..
gigi die genetically cepat rosak.. cam gigi aku.. (yes, it is genetic)
aku gosok gigi bagai nak rak, pun lagi cepat rosak dari rafiq yg only brush once a day... kalau dia brush pun 30 saat macam mandi kerbau punye style.. but still gigi better shape than mine... life is unfair.. I deal with it... no issues...


oh and I received my BRTC BB cream... excitedness!


ni sanaa, suruh aku jadik fotografer die pakai tudung sri munawwarah... (which is on sale now)... aku pakai tudung ni, kitorang tuka2 tudung kat tandas... seriusly I am fugly wearing munawwarah... buruk gile... which is bagus gak... sebab MAHAL GILE tudung munawwarah nih....

permohonan nak jual tudung anggerik/hamidah/dubai dah lulus... bagitau sket tudung camne yang korang suka... test market.... kalau ikut aku, tudung takyah gosok je aku beli..

Tudung Hamidah Nipis (THN)
Takde awning .... designed utk dipakai bersama anak tudung..
tapi I prefer to wear just like that...
ikut design, see-thru tudung ni tak obvious sangat
http://www.koleksitudung.com/v3/category.php?id_category=12

Tudung HamidahTebal No Awning
Takde awning, tak see-thru cam THN
http://www.koleksitudung.com/v3/category.php?id_category=13

Tudung Hamidah Tebal Berawning
Ade awning, kain tak see-thru
http://www.koleksitudung.com/v3/category.php?id_category=8

aku tau hangpa semua teruja.... jangan pi beli dulu  noh.. tunggu aku  jual baru beli... hahahha

tiru sanaa.. nak letak followers... jemput follow2..
tapi aku takdek hadiah....hahah
ade sesuatu for giveaway... tapi simpan for future...

malas nak hos gamba,resize etc etc..
lagipun terlupa bawak kamera best..
so hanye gamba kamera henfon jek...

tapi syok betul nursing...
terus kong dalam flight on the way.. and on the way back...
also in the van trip on the way and on the way back..
sebab if die active, memang pengsan nak kejar layan

taktau camne nak survive without nursing..
my advantage is nearing expiration date.. uwaahh
also no needs for termos, botol, susu tepung, scooping2...cuci cucian sana sini..
shit... im too lazy for formula... renyahss!!

also how to survive without babywearing...
tak kuasa betul nak heret stroller kat jalanan...

all good things must come to an end..... takpe.. aku akan enjoy till expiry date

 

koleksi tudung pemalas ku.. dah ade 6.. cukup bekalan nak bermalas-malasan semingguan..

seriusly.. senang gile travel... iron..? no need..... basuh sidai kat dlm hotel pun sempat kering kot overnight..

aku ingat nak jadik reseller.... ade sape berminat nakbeli tak kalau aku jual..? hahahah 

silap2 aku sapu semua.... aku still takde yg kaler purple, or blue.. or red... 

pastu ade 3 yg ade unsur2 animal printy ... sungguh terrase liar.. rawwrrrr!

ngantuk giler ni...
tapi takut nak tido..
takut dikejutkan..
takut tido tak puas....
takut to want something and not get it (good sleep laa.. not a metaphor)

saiko sungguh aku....
esok nak pi amek tudung hamidah...
sabau jelah aku ngn thaipusan hari sabtu tu

i think last year pun aku ade percubaan amek parcel kat mail depot on saturday..
tapi tgk2 tutup sebab thaipusam... stress..